Rebecca’s Manhattan

If there are two things you have come to expect of me, they are 1. cursing and 2. making outlandish statements like how I invented the question mark.

So I know you will be skeptical when I tell you that Rebecca’s manhattan is the best in the whole fucking world. But that statement is not just on-brand, it is true.

So, here’s the story: My friend Rebecca has had a million manhattans and I have had a million manhattans (and not just in one sitting). Some were good and some sucked ass. As in too-sweet monstrosities with crushed ice or neon pink cherries or effing pineapple. Pineapple? Really???

And then one night she texted me with a recipe. “A manhattan”, she wrote. “A really good one.”

Tomasso, the manager at her favorite Italian restaurant had served her this and then was nice enough to give her the recipe. Rebecca, being the awesome person she is, and my bestie, followed this recipe by gifting me a bottle of Luxardo Sangue Morlacco, the key to this delightful concoction.

But don’t take only Rebecca’s and my recommendation. See the glowing reviews below:

“This is the best damn thing in the whole wide world.” - literally everyone.

See?

Now. How do you know if you are worthy of this Manhattan? Try to find a bottle of Luxardo Sangue Morlacco liqueur. If you can find one, you’re worthy.

Sangue Morlacco is a sweet cherry liqueur, not the maraschino liqueur the same company sells in the iconic basket-wrapped bottle. Both are outstanding but serve different purposes in cocktails.

One could say the Luxardo family knows cherries. I was hoping the company motto would be “Popping cherries since 1821” but I couldn’t find that anywhere on their website. Clearly they need me writing their copy.

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Shit You Need

1. 2.5 ounces rye

2. .5 ounces Sangue Morlacco liqueur

3. .5 ounces Cocchi Vermouth di Torino or Carpano Antica vermouth

4. Orange twist for garnish. This is not a slice of orange. This is a shaving of the orange rind without the white pith, “expressed” over the glass and then placed along the inside of the glass, so you get a bit of orange aroma as you drink.

5. Cocktail cherries, also for garnish. Find small ones in syrup so dark it almost looks black. Luxardo, Jack Rudy, and Filthy Food all make great ones.

I am a huge fan of bitters - I even make my own - but I do not use them here. Rye has great spicy and grass notes, and with the cherry against the orange, it’s perfect.

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Keep Calm and justeffingmix

1. Add rye, liqueur, and vermouth to a mixing glass. Add a generous few handfuls of ice and stir 30 sec.

2. Pour into a chilled glass (neat), or into a double old-fashioned glass with one large ice cube.

3. Place two cherries on a cocktail skewer and add to glass. Express a bit of the orange oil from the peel over the glass, and add the peel to the glass.

4. Enjoy with a glowing fire, ideally in a smoking jacket. Or, even better, a non-smoking jacket…you will live longer and enjoy many more manhattans that way.

Smoked Rosemary Negroni

As the summer begins to retreat and autumn slowly drifts in on the cool evening breezes, it is time to change your cocktail program.  There are so many flavors of fall that can be infused into your cocktails.  This can be easily done by infusing liquors with a variety of flavor notes including winter herbs like rosemary or the rich chocolatey depths of espresso.  Here is the recipe for my smoked rosemary Negroni.  Enjoy…

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Infusion:

Pour 325 ml of a sweet vermouth (I prefer Carpano Antica Forluma) into an airtight, resealable container.  Save the bottle as you will return the infused vermouth to the bottle.  In the palm of your hand slap 3-4 springs of rosemary.  This will open the leaves of the rosemary allowing the oils to be expressed and infuse in the vermouth.  Drop the whole springs in, seal the container and place in a dark area to infuse.  Allow the vermouth to infuse for 24-48 hours.  The longer it infuses, the stronger the rosemary flavor.  When the infusion is complete, strain out and discard the rosemary and return the vermouth to the bottle.  The infused vermouth will store in you refrigerator for up to 4 weeks.

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Cocktail:

1 ounce London style dry gin (Botanist, Plymouth Navy Strength, or St. George)

1 ounce rosemary infused sweet vermouth 

1 ounce Campari

Place each of the above into a mixing glass.  Add enough chunks of crystal clear ice so the ice rises above the level of liquid.  Stir with a bar spoon for 37-46 seconds.  Strain into a chilled rocks glass fitted with a large crystal clear ice cube.  Place a sprig of rosemary in the glass and then light it on fire with a cedar match (or another flame source).  As is burns place the entire drink under a glass cloche until the flame is extinguished.  Remove and serve.

Cheers!

How To Stock Your Bar With Five Bottles

I am pleased as rum punch to introduce a new contributor to the site: JPM, aka Agent Four. I feel lucky to have enticed him away from MI5’s secretive cocktail program for what I hope will be the first of many glimpses into the thrilling world of adult beverages.

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Like Mark Twain once said, the difference between the right word and the almost right word is like the difference between a lightning bug and lightning.  Or as Lucius would say, it’s the difference between fuck and fuck you.  Bottom line: knowing matters.

This is only the beginning and there is more for you to know.

Picture The Great Gatsby.

No, not Leonardo’s movie, I’m talking about the book.

Can you conjure that time when gentlemen wore fedoras, and women wore long satin gloves?

No?

Okay, how about Mad Men.

Or better yet, the two-martini lunches.

Those were the days of glamor. 

Of luxury. 

Of simpler times and simpler things.

What happened to holding the door open to a stranger?

What happened to tucking in your shirt?

What happened to shining your shoes?

What happened to a fucking gorgeous cocktail to be savored alone or with your dear friends and family?

What happened to slowing down, noticing the special moments; those moments in life that matter.

Join me.

Help me.

We need this right now.

Let’s channel parts of Gatsby or Mad Men (even if those guys were a bunch of a-holes).

Too often in life we wish we did things that we do not actually do.  For many, one of those things includes making cocktails at home.  I’m not talking about a fucking Jack and Coke or a putrid Seven and Seven.  (A small portion of my soul actually died after writing that sentence).  

I am talking about a well-crafted Old Fashioned or an exquisitely executed East India cocktail.  I’m referring to elixirs that require passion and soul to craft.  They have meaning and depth and history and they tell a story.  They materialize only at the moment when the ingredients come together.  They require more than a bottle opener or a corkscrew.  You CAN make cocktails at home...and these days? Why the hell wouldn’t you?

There was a time when people, men and women, could, at the drop of a fedora or the removal of elbow length satin gloves, mix a balanced yet complex cocktail.   They could sit back in a well-appointed leather chair and have a conversation while sipping a perfectly made Manhattan and allow the languid moments of a quiet evening to pass slowly into the night.  Sadly, that time seems to have passed us by, like the idea of a handwritten thank you note on letter pressed eighty-pound cotton paper.  Well, I am hoping you might be willing to help me bring back the joy and sophistication of that era.  

To do this well, (and we here at justeffingcook.com never recommend doing anything unless you intend to do it kick-supreme-effing-ass well) you will need to gather a few critical supplies.  But from a small collection comes an expansive horizon of opportunities.  

Learn what you need to know to enjoy a good cocktail and pay attention to the moments in life that matter.  But before the joy, before the glamour, before the sophistication happens, we need to understand the spirits.

The Spirits

Vodka

A good place to start is with a bottle of vodka.  According to the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF), vodka is an odorless, colorless, tasteless spirit.  It is often the choice of spirit for those that don’t like the taste of alcohol.  Mix it up with anything sweet and it is a simple and efficient way to get shitfaced.  

Vodka is one of the oldest spirits and one that is distilled in many countries.   Vodka is like a crescent wrench, it can be used to turn nuts, bolts, and screws, but you can also use it to drive in a nail, or shatter a window, or break the fingers of a captured spy or hit a wild boar as it is charging at you in the underbrush in Namibia.  The lesson: Vodka is versatile.  Vodkas are often a grain-based alcohol made from corn.  Some vodkas are made from potatoes and yet others are made from wheat.  Because vodka is supposedly “tasteless” there is no need to spend a lot of money on vodka.  You can get a very balanced well distilled vodka for a decent price.  Tito’s is an excellent American vodka that is made from corn.  Another great option would be Belvedere vodka.  Oh, and don’t forget, Vodka is an easy spirit to infuse with flavors.  

Gin

In my mind, no other spirit is more underrated and misunderstood than gin.  It has an incredibly rich history and played a key role in providing some light during the darkness of prohibition, yet it is so easily dismissed.  

Because Gins often have such a distinct flavor profile—that heavy, medicinal juniper palette—I often hear: “I hate Gin, it tastes like I’m drinking a pine tree”.  This is usually delivered by a scrunched-up face that looks like it just had a fucking lock of nose hairs forcefully extracted from it.  But let me be the first to tell, you don’t know shit about Gin.  Due to the great American marketing machine, most of you have enjoyed the Toyota Corolla, the Honda Civic, and the Nissan Sentra of Gins.  That’s right, Bombay Sapphire, Tanqueray, and Hendricks are, well, just so cliché.

No other spirit has as broad of a flavor profile as Gin.  Consequently, not all Gins are created equal.  Since there are so many interesting Gins, I would argue that one may want to consider buying more than one.  Put simply, the perfect Gin for a Martini (Plymouth) is not the perfect Gin for a Gimlet (Sipsmith).

I don’t have time to delve into it here; but know that there are two distinct styles: Old Tom versus London Dry.  Oh, and the dryness of a Martini HAD nothing to do with the vermouth, but that is a different fucking story for a different fucking time.

One thing I suggest everyone do, is to spend some time at your favorite craft cocktail bar, chatting up the bartender.  Remember though, there is a very precise way to do this, don’t fuck it up.   Much like defusing a bomb, if you don’t know how to do it, then don’t.  You don’t want to be that guy or gal at the bar—the one everyone hates—especially the bar tender.  (I can go into that detail later) Any way ask them what their favorite Gins are and which ones they like to use in which cocktails.  You just might meet a bear named St. George, who knows a Botanist from Barr Hill, who saw a rabbit covered in gunpowder, heading to Japan to fetch six botanicals.  Before you know it, you will be on a Gin tasting flight that could change the trajectory of the next decade of your life if you have the gumption to be open minded.  You’ll also likely be fucking wasted by the end.

And after all, isn’t life about creating and enjoying great moments?

Rum

Ah, Rum, the magic Caribbean elixir.  Rum is like Captain Jack Sparrow: unapologetically carefree, capricious, concocting, conceited.   Bourbon thinks Rum doesn’t give a fuck.  And Rum doesn’t give a fuck what Bourbon thinks.  Rum knows what it is and what it is not; and it doesn’t try to be something it can’t.  

Rum is soft.  

Rum is supple.  

Rum is content.  

But Rum is precarious…It is like the disheveled guy at the poker table that everyone thinks is the sucker, but in the end, he walks away not with all the loot (although he could have if he wanted to), but with enough to buy a good breakfast and fill his pockets for a day of mischievous fun.  Because tomorrow’s hangover, is well, tomorrow, and today is all he knows.  Rum is like a middle child, it has a cool confidence because it knows it is always invited to be a part of some of the best cocktails there are.  In the end, Rum delivers a smooth, sweet, soulful, seduction.  

Rum IS NOT FUCKING Captain Morgan!!!!

I would recommend you start with a white rum such as Plantation’s 3 Star or Flor de Caña Extra Seco or Rhum Clement Canne Bleue.  Once you have found the white rum you like, you can start heading down the rabbit hole that is dark rums.  These can be so beautiful and complex.  Dark Rums are wonderful to sip year-round.  Just some thoughts…Planation Old Barbados Rum, Clement VSOP Rhum, Don Papa Rum 10 Years.  

Tequila

Perhaps no other spirit has left a greater trail of destruction than Tequila.  Whiskey has taken more marriages, and Gin has taken more careers, but Tequila has probably taken more people’s virginity.  But let’s acknowledge that this might not be entirely Tequila’s fault.  Right?  

I mean when the bar tender says, would you like another and you blurt out “fuck yeah” before she can finish asking you if you want another, that might not be Tequila’s fault.  

Or when you are so effing wasted that you are oblivious to the fact that two of your hair extensions have fallen out because they got snagged on the strap of your camisole as you were taking it off so you didn’t splatter barf on it while leaning over the toilet.  And now, as you are walking back into the kitchen from the bathroom (where you left your camisole on the towel bar), unaware of the fact that you are rhythmically bobbing up and down like a pirate with a peg leg that is too short because you broke the left heel of your Christian Louboutaine stiletto (attempting to do a cartwheel), you are greeted by a sea of inquisitive faces and curious thrill seekers wondering why you are only wearing a bra, jeans and a pair of stilettos with one heel missing, and then someone says; “hey let’s do Tequila shots!”  And you say, “OH, HELLS TO THE YES”.   Is that Tequila’s fault?  

I don’t think so.

Now, let’s get a few things straight:

• Tequila is made exclusively from the piña (not the leaves) of Blue Agave 

• Mezcal on the other hand is made from any type of Agave

• Tequila is produced primarily in the town of Tequila in the state of Jalisco, Mexico

• Tequila, like bourbon and other spirits and wine, have strict production laws

• It is protected as Mexican Designation of Origin Product (think Champagne and France)

• UNESCO designated the region near Tequila a world heritage site in 2006

• There is no such thing as a worm in a bottle of Tequila—that is a marketing gimmick and it’s bullshit and has caused so many people to think tequila is cheap and shitty and IT IS NOT!

Aging:

• Blanco (white) or Plata (silver): no aging, bottled immediately

• Reposado: aged between 2 – 12 months 

• Añejo: aged between 12 – 36 months

• Extra Añejo: aged more than 36 months

History is filled with great ironies, like Beethoven going deaf with he was trying to finish his greatest symphony, (the 9th).  Or that Gunpowder was invented in the 9th century by Chinese alchemists who were attempting to find an “elixir of immortality”.  (Just think of the mortality gunpowder has caused)

One of the great ironies of the brilliant TV drama Mad Men is that while it rekindled people’s interest in classic cocktails by celebrating the old school cocktail culture and demonstrated the rich soulful elements of the perfect craft cocktail, that very advertising world brought about so many shitty things that have sullied the true spirit of cocktails: such as goddamn Zima, or slogans like “shaken not stirred’, and worms in Tequila bottles.  As a result, people are left with the impression that Tequila is a shitty south of the border spirit that left you with a wicked hangover and puke in your hair on that one epic spring break trip.  

Well I am here to tell you Tequila is anything but…  

To start, just stock your bar with a nice mid-priced blanco Tequila.  You can get great Tequilas for $20-30.  Sure, you can get sucked into the work of a Don Draper ad man and think you have to buy Petrón or be seduced by George Clooney’s crew with Casamigos (to be fair George is no longer part of it, he already cashed his billion dollar check when he sold it.  How lucky can one man be?  I mean how many days is the sun going to shine on same dog’s ass?)  Instead I’d steer you toward Espolon or Horitos Plata, or my personal favorite Arette (named after a famous horse that won 2 Gold and 1 Bronze Olympic medals for horse jumping).  If you are planning on making cocktails vs sipping the Tequila then pass on using aged spirits. The same is true for those “Cadillac” margaritas using “gold” tequilas. That’s is just some huckster who is patting you on your back with one hand while he is taking your wallet with the other.   First, you are wasting money.  Second, you are wasting the point of the aged spirit.  Lastly, you actually want the sharpness of the edge of silver Tequila to give the flavor and punch needed to balance a well-crafted cocktail.  

Creative tip:  Consider Tequila or Mezcal in place of the usual spirits to riff on classic cocktails such as the Mai Tai, or Manhattan.   

Whiskey

Whiskey:

Fuck where do I begin? 

(I’ll hold off on my opinions)

If we are going to discuss Whiskey, then we have to discuss Bourbon and Scotch.  And we have to talk about Scotland, and Ireland and Canada, and The Commonwealth of Kentucky, and Tennessee.  It can get confusing because it is a long and winding tale of low land Scottish farmers, and back woods stills, and taxes, and gentlemen and cowboys, and politics.  But that tale will be told at a different time. 

I suppose a good place to start is with this simple axiom: all Bourbon is Whiskey, but not all Whiskey is Bourbon.  

Whiskey can wear cowboy boots, so can Tequila and Vodka: but not Gin.  Whiskey can wear a tuxedo. but not Rum.  Whiskey hangs out in honkytonks and attends galas, and tells stories around campfires, and brokers deals at Old Ebbitt Grill.  Whiskey can be sanguine while being acerbic.  It’s demur, complex, and meaningful.

And it’s fucking awesome.

If you’re going to do this well, you will need buy more than one bottle of Whiskey. But just like Sir Edmond Hillary, every climb begins with a first step.  So, here is the deal, buy a Whiskey you like and don’t apologize for it.  I like rye, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like Bourbon.  There are some amazingly beautiful and rich and complex Whiskies.  Be thoughtful about you purchase.  If you are planning on making a cocktail then choose a mid-level Whiskey.  If you are planning on drinking this neat or using it in an Old Fashioned then consider a nice Bourbon.   It’s almost laughable to suggest a Whiskey, it’s like suggesting a man to a woman.  “Hey, you should really consider this guy, he is a Greg, college educated, has a good job, but wears tee shirts under his button downs”.  In the end you just have to try a bunch before you figure out what you like.  

OK fine, put my fingers in a vice, I’ll suggest a few:

Templeton Rye

Mitcher’s 

Rittenhouse

High West Campfire

Knob Creek

Basil Hayden’s

Buffalo Trace

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And there you have it, how to stock your bar with 5 bottles.  But my friends, that is NOT all you need to know.  Next time we will talk about modifiers, and ice, and tools, and well, the rest of the story.  

Santa Fe Margarita

On the rocks like God intended.

I hold this truth to be self-evident: Under no circumstances should a blender be allowed to touch a margarita. In fact, blenders are even against the law in the city of Santa Fe.

I kid.

They aren’t against the law…yet. But put tequila into one and they will throw your ass outside the city limits and leave you for the coyotes.

I grew up in Santa Fe, and I can tell you they take thier food and drink fucking seriously there. They were doing heirloom produce before heirloom was a thing. There is a cult revolving around green chile - its uses, merits of different roasting methods, subtle differences between varieties. At the fancy restaurants, in addition to a wine list there will be a tequila list.

If your only exposure to tequila was what you drank from a squirt gun while super-fucked-up on spring break, the existence of tequila lists will not compute. Allow me to drop some knowledge on you.

Knowledge drop #1:

All alcohol is produced by the fermentation - by yeast - of carbohydrate. In the case of tequila, the carbohydrate source is agave, a desert plant with “stay the fuck away from me” spikes but yummy sweet sap. The products of its fermentation are distilled and either bottled as is (with some dilution to the proper proof), or aged in oak casks. The time it spends in that oak will add aromas and flavors, and will soften the edges of the spirit. Much like whiskey, the longer the spirit spends in oak, the richer, more complex, and more expensive the final spirit will be. Like most spirits, there are very strict definitions around where tequila can be made and how it is labeled.

We could get into the regions that tequila is produced and the differences in character between them, and how and when the roots are harvested and baked and all that, but honestly, I wouldn’t be able to do it justice. Plus this post is already chock full of facts and pretty fucking light on the swears.

So let’s boil it down to the bare bones basics. There are four main categories of tequila: blanco, which spends no time in barrel, reposado, which spends between two months and one year in oak, añejo, which spends one to three years in oak, and extra añejo, which is anything that lives in barrel beyond three years. “Gold” and “silver” aren’t official terms but marketing terms, though “silver” usually means blanco.

Añejo and extra añejo are sipping tequilas. Drink them straight, with a touch of water, or a cube of ice. Then savor their complex, savings account-draining flavors. Blanco and reposado are the ones to use for mixed drinks. I prefer reposado for margaritas. The smoother edges and layers of flavor really do come through in the final product.

A reposado on the left, a blanco on the right.

Knowledge drop #2:

“Daisies” are alcoholic beverages containing spirit, liqueur, and citrus juice. For instance, sidecars, cosmopolitans, and margaritas. Daisies are shaken over ice, and then can be served “up” or on the rocks (or frozen, but then you are diluting the alcohol and it’s really hard to do it well and then there are the coyotes to consider so just forget I mentioned it, okay?)

There are some classic ratios quoted for daisies, but I like Eat Street Social’s recipe best:

• 1 1/2 oz spirit

• 3/4 oz citrus

• 1/2 oz liqueur

• 1/4 oz simple syrup

I also hit up my sister, who still lives in Santas Fe and makes a really fucking excellent margarita. Her recipe is simple: equal parts lime juice, Cointreau, and tequila. As a scientist, I felt rigorous research was required.

I made the simple syrup, which is simply equal volumes water and sugar, heated until the sugar dissolves, and then cooled. I used Dry Curaçao for the liqueur, and La Gritona resposado for the tequila. I started with the two recipes and altered from there. My sister’s recipe was the clear winner of the two starting drinks, though I felt the need to adjust the sweet/sour ratio and experiment with bitters. What follows is the final version.

But first, a note on ingredients:

For liqueur: Cointreau, Dry Curaçao (pictured), Royal Combier, Luxardo Triplum triple sec, and Combier Liqueur d’Orange are all good options, though the first two are my favorites. Grand Marinier is a bit more brandy forward and meant more as a sipper than a mixer, and is more expensive anyway.

For tequila: Feel free to experiment to see what you like amongst the blanco and reposado options out there, but some of my favorites are Don Julio, Herradura, Tequila Ocho, and my new favorite, La Gritona. La Gritona is a small, female owned distillery in Jalisco. The tequila is delicious, is bottled in recycled glass, and is a fucking steal at the price. Nothing not to love there.

Bitters: Bitters are for cocktails what salt and pepper are to food. They add dimension, lengthen or bend flavors, and make you look like a fucking cocktail genius. Experiment, but in a margarita stay away from anything purely orange (you already have that in the liqueur) and look for bright flavor profiles. I settled on Bittercube Jamaican #2, with notes of grapefruit, hibiscus, allspice and ginger.

Shaping up to be a pretty good evening.

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Shit You Need

1. 1 1/2 ounces tequila reposado

2. 1 1/2 ounces Cointreau or Dry Curaçao

3. 1 ounce freshly squeezed lime juice

4. 10 drops Bittercube Jamaican #2 bitters

5. Salt for the rim of your glass (I used fleur de sel, but kosher salt could work, as well as “margarita” salt)

You may note that this is a total of 3 ounces of 80 proof liquor. Treat it with respect or it will hammer your fine ass into the ground and leave you for the coyotes.

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Keep Calm and justeffingmix

1. Prep your glass: Rub the rim of a double old-fashioned glass with a lime slice and invert onto a plate or bowl holding your salt. Add ice to the glass.

2. To a cocktail shaker, add the first four ingredients listed above, along with a generous handful or two of ice.

3. Shake for 30 seconds (it’s longer than you think).

4. Strain into the prepared glass.

5. Repeat as necessary.

By the end of my research, both my presentation and photographic skills had suffered greatly. Totally worth it.